Looking Forward

I was with Red Riant ( my beloved Vespa ) enjoying the cool Monday breeze when suddenly I noticed that I got a handful of things I looked forward to for the next 2 months or so. I should be counting my blessing twice and not just once since 2013 is only 21 days old and yet life has been so awesome ! Syukran !

Let's start from the very beginning which is this week itself. Another long weekend awaited for me by end of this week.....aint that something everybody would look forward to? Anything which doesnt require me to work is considered as a blessing even though if it's just a few hours of  break due to electricity black-off. With so much pain & sorrow in the world today, these little thing counts - beggars better not be a choosers, ok. I will be taking a day off on Friday which gives me a total of 5 days leave altogether woooo hooooo !!!

I've been waiting for February to arrive from the very beginning of 2013 actually. Apparently, I have been promised luxurious gifts by end of Jan or latest by mid of Feb. As much as how fairy tale-ish it has been, I can't help but to wonder as to how this interesting "game" is gonna end. As for now, things are pretty much hazy still that I am not in the position to blog about it just yet. So, lets just hope it will end very-very soon for I neither have the patience nor the energy to keep on playing.

Errmmm....what else is happening in February? Oh yes the Chinese New Year. No I am not celebrating my half clan's festival.....but I am still looking forward to it coz I have an excellent plan to celebrate it. Me and a few of my ex-classmates from school are planning for a re-union on CNY. The last time all of us sit together was a few years ago...so, obviously we really have a lot to catch-up.

So, what else? My birthday of coz. And that's why this second month of the year has always been my favourite month. Though at this age, it's just gonna be another day for me but I would still love to at least sit down and think of all the good things I've encountered during those years I've lived whilst being grateful to be given yet another year to cherish.

Last but not least, is no other than the 3-Hills Ride for my Vespa group in early March. Though this is already my 5th ride so far, but the excitement and anticipation is never lesser. I've been looking forward to it the moment they make an announcement about this ride a few weeks ago. Just thinking about it could give me multiple orgasms already hahaha !!!

And now I am just going to live my life the way I planned it. May Allah give His blessings and that everything will turn out perfect. Amin.

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A Comeback? Nahhhhh !!!

I post a short write-up about lonely vs being alone on my Facebook wall earlier, which reads like this :

A lot of time people got confused between being alone & being lonely. Often they asked me whether I'm lonely just because I opt to be single. I'm alone quite frequently and I don't feel lonely in the least. I enjoy being in the company of others, but have no problem with being by myself for I have learned to become my own best company.

Being alone doesnt mean you are lonely. In fact, you can be in a room full with people but you can still feel the emptiness in you.

Everybody has choices and you are what you choose to be !

So, what's with the status then ? Any stories behind it? Indeed there is but dont get too excited as it aint juicy at all. An old fren of mine text me asking of my wellbeing which is so thoughtful of him. He then was wondering why I am still single n starts asking me questions about being lonely and all.

You see, this is something men failed to understand. As it is, the biology of a man and a woman are never the same ( and thank God for that ). But men being the not-so-smart creatures are always forgetting this very basic fact that they thought we, women are exactly like them.

Guys, here me out. Women might look fragile but we are indeed the stronger ones. We don't have problems being on our own. Just becoz sex is like food for you guys, doesn't mean women would die starving without it. We are not what you think we are......we are much better than that --> we are  not men, we are W.O.M.E.N. Period.

Actually come to think of it, i cant blame the men completely. Being single seems to have a number of negative perspective in our society. For example, when you watch a film you’re supposed to feel sorry for the single, lonely girl who desperately wants to be loved. This is definitely the wrong message being sent to the people out there. There is nothing to be sad of by being single coz being single doesnt always mean lonely.

I love having the freedom to live my life my very own way, without having to consider one's feelings or opinions. Well, I may not have a guy to spend my time with but I do have plenty of friends to go out with and my daughter to keep me company. The best thing of being single is that I don't have to please anyone other than myself - a luxury not everybody gets.

Ok I admit that sometimes I do feel missed out especially on festive occasions such as Hari Raya when I have to visit relatives on my own, or on Marsya's school events when other kids have both of their parents present but not hers. But thinking of the hard work, the pain, the tears in building and sustaining a relationship, I'd easily give it a pass. It's just not worth it - well, at least for me.

So to all single women out there, you don't need to feel lonely living the single life as there is more to living than just to get married. Even if that special someone never arrives, just enjoy every moment of your single life offers.

It is easy in the world to live after the world's opinions, it is easy in solitude to live after your own, but the great main is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude

~  Ralph Waldo Emerson  ~

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Hello !

Hello, I am back.....and this time no more sweet promises from me. I am neither not gonna say I'm back for good nor am I gonna continue updating my blog religiously like I used to - coz I am positively sure none of those gonna happen.

Honestly I miss my blog so very much. I miss scribbling my thoughts about things I love and hate. I miss sharing my shopping addiction with my fellow readers. And above all of course, I miss all the men-bashing sessions I used to have in here.

I really wish things could stay the same but obviously that would never happen. Nothing stays the same - sooner or later some things, if not everything is bound to change.

I used to have enuff time to spend on my blog. But that was then. That was before I commit myself to the society I am living with. I am not complaining for I know it's all for a good cause. After so much I've gotten, I guess it's high time to give back. And frankly, I am grateful I had the chance to do that.

Anyway, ideally with an IPad in my possession, updating my blog shouldnt be that much of a hassles anymore. But still, time is something very, very valuable and priceless to me these days. Though I do have everything it takes to write a post, I am still lacking the most important thing which is time - so many things to do yet too little time..sigh !

Sometimes I really have a very good n interesting story to write but by the time I am free, it was neither good nor interesting anymore. I got tired and lazy and the only thing I wanna do is to sit down doing completely nothing. I am not sure whether this is what they called the aging process or I am simply being lazy ( the latter sounds more like it tho ! )

By the way, this post was written on my bed a few minutes before I dozed off. I just feel like writing and this post has definitely makes me feel good thereafter. The fact is I have plenty of things I wanna write about like my new love of my life, my trip to Penang (which is not just any other trip), my dreams, my hatred - though this one is quite common hehehe. I so wanna share all these stories with you guys and therefore I would try my very best to find the time to do it.

Perhaps I should stop my quick naps in the office & use that time to write. Or maybe write while having my packed lunch in the office. Or I should just write whenever I dont feel like doing my work ( which practically every f***in day hahaha). Whatever it is, the bottom line is that -  I WILL FIND TIME TO UPDATE THIS BLOG.

Having to said that, adios from me. Till we meet again, Insyallah.

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Muahhhhhhhh !!!!!

The above kiss is for no other than my company / management for giving their employee another long weekend this week.For the first time ever we are getting a replacement holiday for a public holiday that falls on Saturday. Tomorrow is the public holiday for Wesak & for that, we are getting next Monday off.....yeeeeee haaaaaaaa !!!

As I mentioned before, our company has just been acquired by General Electric about a year ago & we are still in the midst of adapting to the new rules & regulations. I dont wanna put my hopes too high up but at the same time I cant help myself but to wish that this is the regular practice in GE whereby the employees shall get a replacement holiday for any public holidays that falls on Saturday.

But even if it's not, I am still grateful for I dont have to work next Monday when most people would. And with Monday being an off day, it means that I have 2 solid days for my next movie marathon - as Astro's free channels will end this Sunday ( damn...I sounded so cheap !! ). Had a really hectic week & I deserve this long break.

So, have a great weekend ahead peeps & for those who are working next Monday - you can start envying me already !!!

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Thank You Astro !

Astro Malaysia was recently voted as the Most Popular Brand at the Putra Brand Awards 2012. And as a gesture of thanks and appreciation, Astro is broadcasting 130 channels free for all subscribers - for a week, starting from 27th April till 6th May 2012 ! 

Thank you Astro - though the vote didnt come from me( and honestly, I dont even know the existence of that Putra Brand Awards).

Like they said, good opportunity like this only comes once and that we shouldnt let it passed without grabbing it. Since my parents were in town on the 27th till the 29th, I cant do much on those days to really appreciate the "gift" I got from Astro.

Starting from the 30th morning till the next 1st May morning, there I was lying on my sofa watching as many movies as these eyes could take it. By the end of the day, I managed to make a marathon of 5 movies whcih is my very own personal record. 

As I told Marsya, never before in my 42 years of age, I've watched that much of movies in a day. By the time I am done with the fifth movies, I feel like throwing up - seriously. It was an absolutely a movie over-dose for me.....buwekkkkk !!!

These were the movies that I watched :

a)   Just Go With It   :  A story about friends turned into lovers - sweet story, I must say

b)  The Last Three Days  :  Suspense to the core till I feel my heart like bursting out !

c)   Narnia 3  :  Too fairy tale-ish for me - dozed off a couple of time through out the movie

d)   No Strings Attached  :  Yucks ! stupid...stupid....stooooopid story ! 

e)   Killer  :  So-so lahhh.....

One thing I realized after watching two Ashton Kutcher's movies back to back is that - he's really a hawt, hawt hottie ! Look, I dont really watch TV, ok....so how would I know this Kutcher boy is actually that hot? He's so tall & has the sweetest smile ever <3 <3 <3  . 

 

Now I understand why Demi has to go under the knife to be with him.......poor Demi !!

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Suck-Ups

Something amazing happened in my office this morning & I just feel like sharing it here in my blog.

I was doing my work when one of the manager in the office came to me to discuss on a project I am currently working on. So, there we were taking and discussing intensely on the subject when the boss's secretary came and told the manager that the big boss is already in.

At that moment itself, in the middle of our "intense discussion", he turned & walked towards the boss's room. It was as if he's being hypnotized whereby he just turn away from me & walked away - without saying even a single word to me who is apparently still talking to him. No "sorry"...no "excuse me"....no nothing at all ....and all i know, I've probably become the first Invisible Woman in the region !

Amazing isnt, it? 

Sucking up in the work place is normal....in fact, very normal. There are at least one employee in every office who sucks up to the boss. In fact, chances are there are a lot more than one. One who constantly hurls flatteries at superiors or laugh a little too much at their so-called jokes. Or maybe one who brings in chocolates for the managers or offers to grab them a coffee from time to time. Or the type of employee who simply stays back in the office just to impress the boss ( though all he's doing is browsing the net !! )

These Suck-Ups....well, everybody knows them. Love them or hate them, the Suck Ups sure know how to get what they want by knowing just the right things to say and a whole lot of brown-nosing. To get what they want, they don’t care who they have to lay on all the false flattery to..as long as they get what they want in the end.

Honestly, I dont really care about these group of people. If you have the quality of being one, go ahead and lick up those ass till it shines. But please have some dignity on yourself - do it in the subtly manner and know just the right amount to flatter without coming across as being too fake. Dont make it so transparent that everyone can see right through you and make them lose their respect on you.

The best thing is still to work you ass out. Work and work smart, efficiently and for the good of your organization. That’s the best way to get ahead and feel good about yourself at the same time.

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An Asshole In the Making

I cant remember when was the last time I felt so, so, so, so angry like this. But one thing I am very sure of is that the last time I felt this way is because of the same reason - men ! Honestly, their stupidity has never failed to get in contact with my tentacles.

Here's the story.....

Last nite, coming back from my committee meeting, Marsya was telling me about this one boy from her school who seems to pick a fight with her for no reason. Apparently my daughter post a new profile pic. of her in FB and tagged her BFFs asking them how was it - which I think is quite normal for any girls. 

Then, came this boy who started commenting her post in a very harsh way.

 

 I really dont understand what's his problem was. If he's a girl maybe, I can assume he's currently having her period. Or if he's a 50++ year old lady, then at least I can forgive her as she might going through a hard menopausal phase. But he's neither one of those, for crying out loud !!! Anyway, thinking back  he's a male and being that alone seems to put all the puzzles together - his gender makes perfect sense after all.

I couldnt find any word that could describe his rudeness. But he somehow reminded me the fact that guys regardless of their age are simply an asshole. Not enough they have an ugly face, they have to top it up with an ugly attitude as well !! Bravo !

Marsya is my only daughter and when somebody treated her this bad, I got really, really upset. I wish I could call this Zafran creature and gave him a piece of my mind but unfortunately Marsya didnt have his number. So, the most I can do is through the FB...sigh !

This is the best I could do though I really wish I cud do more - so gerammmm !!!

His reply came the next day since it was already 12 midnite when I post the above comment. Zafran just proved to himself and the rest of the world that he's actually an airhead when he could say this to me :

He actually deleted his particular comment where he called Marsya a "bitch" and stupidly replied to me while trying to make me look like a fool. Well, too bad Zafran coz you are the one being a fool here. FYI, I am not a 13 year old girl whom you used to bully or curse everyday at school - I am a 42 year old woman whose brain is still working at its best. 

Knowing that this fool might delete some of his comments (which he actually did), I've saved all of them the night before right after I read them.  And this is the part where he cursed my Marsya and later denies it :

These were my last words to Zafran and I really wished I could say it out to his face coz that would be much, much more magnificently glorious.

One might say that I am being stupid for picking a fight with a kid. But then what he did is very wrong and if everybody ignored him just because he's still a boy, imagine what kind of a man he would grow up into !

C'mon, we have enough men out there who treated women worse than a door mat and we certainly dont wanna add the quantity up, dont we?

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My New Black Lacy Tops

Since my BFF, Carol left me about a month & a half ago, shopping has no longer been part of my routine during lunch time. When she's around we would made our shopping schedule to meet our visitation quota for both Sg Wang & Pavilion, which would be once a month for each venue. We dont have any other choice but to plan this way in order to curb our shopping habit coz the more we visit these places, the more we're gonna spend.

Now that my Carol is no longer here with me, I've become crippled for I've lost the other side of my shopping "kaki". I'd stay in the office from the moment I stepped in every morning till its time to go back. That's how boring & dull my days in the office have become - which explains why I start blogging again hahaha.

But then a woman gotta do what a woman gotta do. And shopping is definitely one thing this particular woman loves to do. And having to live in the internet world of no boundaries, shopping doesnt mean that you have to leave your seat in the office - if you cant get yourself to the shop, the internet will bring the shop to you yeeee haaaaa !!!

I've been quite free these few days after a long week of striving & struggling. And with that free time I've decided to check out all those long forgotten shopping blogs which I used to visit before. Sure enough, being a perfectly normal woman with desires, one of those blog manage to appear in my shopping radar. 

It was this tops that has been continuously blinking in my radar system. 

The tops looks nice & the price is reasonable too.....so, what more can I ask for?  The next thing I know, I'm already half way through the order form. Well, happiness doesnt come flying to you if you dont go looking for it, right? And that's exactly what I did - I've go looking for my happiness & I've found it ! Bingo !

It was fast as I've gotten my parcel the next day itself. Without sparing a single second, I took out the tops & examine it closely. Okay....it was not exactly 100% as what I expect it to be but neither does it a total disappointment.

First, the material. From the picture, it doesnt really look that transparent but the fact is, it's made of a lacy kind of material which is totally transparent. So, for a hijabista like me [ for those who didnt know what a hijabista is, well hijabista is a fashionista who wears a hijab --> like me :-) ], I definitely have to use an inner with it, unless of course, if I wanna be called gilanista then I can always omit the inner!

See how transparent it is !

Secondly is the sleeves. The actual ones seems to be much shorter as compared from the one worn by the model. But then, I was corrected by my princess who seems to be much smarter than me ( ehemm....just for this particular moment ). "Mummy, the model is skinny & you are not - obviously, the sleeves will be longer on her" - dabooshhh, that whole sentence hits my face right away the same way a fist came popping out from the Jack-In The-Box toy once the lid is open.

Though it's hard, truth remains the truth huhuhu. Anyway, even if I'm using size zero like the model or even if the sleeves are longer, I still have to use the inner, isnt it? So, the sleeves basically has been overridden by the lacy material & with that in the picture, the tops is not that bad after all....especially after I've put it on me with my red palazzo....walllahhhhh !!!!

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English With An Accent

As compared to other Asian countries (Singapore excluded), Malaysians should be grateful as the majority of us can speak English very well. Some of the pakcik & makcik can even speak this international language though it wont be that perfect but good enough to converse & relay the messages to others.

If you go to other Asian countries like Japan, Korea, Taiwan or Thailand, you'll be facing hard time communicating with them. Majority of the people there doesnt know a single word of English - even their youngsters too - let alone the pakcik & makcik.

What I'm gonna blog today is not about how well Malaysians speaks English but more on how they speak the language. If you noticed, there are two types of English-speaking community in our country :

1)    The genuine ones
2)    The wannabes


Ok, lets start with the first ones - the genuine group. This group belongs to the people who were born & breed abroad where everybody around them speaks with an accent. English with Mat Salleh accent is usually acquired after years of living in a Mat Salleh's country. It's quite natural to adopt an accent after being exposed to another culture for a certain period of time - it's a form of adaptation, I would call it.


Some of these people dont even leave the country but the people around them speaks that way. Their dad / mum is an expatriate for instant. Or they went to an international school where all their friends speaks with an accent. 

But if you've been living in Malaysia for 20 years then went to Britain for a year & came back speaking like Brit. 5 years or more is okay but 1 year? And to make it worse, they act as if they were born English as well, which basically means emulating the English personality / lifestyle. I don't mind if they emulate the good, beneficial aspects of the English culture though but please dont be a wannabe. No matter how interested you are in a culture, it takes several years (obviously more than a year) to move from one refined accent to the other.

I have an acquaintance who speaks in deep Mat Salleh accent - though she has never been more than 7 days to any Mat Salleh countries and sure enough, she's adapting the Mat Salleh's lifestyle as well. Okay, she's been working with an International company for years but so did I. The only thing I am lacking is a Mat Salleh boyfriend like her (unfortunately my "asset" is not abundance enough to attract one). She's now married to her boyfie & her accents gets thicker by the days - which I believe was greatly assisted by the "fluids transfer" between them hahaha.

A lot of us really cant stand her accent coz they sounded so made up & fake. There's one time where a non-Malay speaks Bahasa Melayu with her & she still responded in English (with pride) which really confused us. It's not that she cant speak Malay - she can even speaks Malay with the local dialects for God's sake. It's just that speaking English with the Mat Salleh accent makes her feel that she's one level up in the local social hierarchy, I supposed. 

Another scenario I would like to share here which happens in my own working place. The nature of our work requires us to speak with the kwailos all the time. There's this one colleague of mine who would automatically change his accent whenever that needs arise. From an Ah Beng he suddenly transforms himself to Andrew & he thought he was making an impression by doing so but little did he knows that he's just making a fool out of himself ! 

My point here is that speaking in English with an accent doesnt place you at a special rank in the local social hierarchy. Neither would you gain more respect from others. In fact, would end up being the gossip material among your peers. What matters most is the perfection of your English in terms of grammar & pronunciation. 

To those who naturally speaks English with the Mat Salleh accent, just continue being yourself & be proud of it. And to those who are just faking it, please dont over do it coz for all I know, you've just turn yourself into a real loser !

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Stronger

You know the bed feels warmer

Sleeping here alone

You know I dream in color

And do the things I want

You think you got the best of me

Think you've had the last laugh

Bet you think that everything good is gone

Think you left me broken down

Think that I'd come running back

Baby you don't know me, cause you're dead wrong

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger

Stand a little taller

Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone

What doesn't kill you makes a fighter

Footsteps even lighter

Doesn't mean I'm over cause you're gone

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, stronger

Just me, myself and I

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger

Stand a little taller

Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone

You heard that I was starting over with someone new

They told you I was moving on, over you

You didn't think that I'd come back

I'd come back swinging

You try to break me, but you see

Thanks to you I got a new thing started

Thanks to you I'm not the broken-hearted

Thanks to you I'm finally thinking about me

You know in the end the day you left was just my beginning

In the end...

The above is the lyrics to the song Stronger by Kelly Clarkson. I love every line of the lyrics - they are just so powerful & amazing that it sent chills down to my spine when I first heard it.

Love this lyrics / song so much that I am dedicating it to all the men who have made an appearance in my life and end up fucking it up. As much as I hate them, I owed them a lot for giving me the valuable experiences that makes me as strong as I am now - what doesnt kill me makes me a fighter.


Though Kelly Clarkson is the original singer to this song, I am putting the video from the Glee casts (which was performed during the Regionals in Season 3) since it was from Glee that I first heard the song. 

Enjoy !

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