06 May 2009


This morning, I find out that two of my new perfumes are missing from my collections. I dont really care anymore which culprit stole them but the thing is I was really emotionally affected because of this. I’ve suffered a greater lost before but this one really pulled me down. I cried so much & yet there are still tears at the edge of my eyes right now while I’m writing this entry.

It’s not the perfumes. It’s because of the things that have been happening to me these few months. I’m just too exhausted already. Don’t think I could hold up to it anymore. God, please gimme a break, will you? I desperately need it as I’m about to explode already. One thing after another – continuously hitting me as bad as one can imagine.

I’ve been very, very strong all these whiles hiding all the pain & miseries behind my weak smile. Could still laughs when the person I’ve trusted stabbed me on my back. Could still smile when God tested me with the greatest trials – financially & emotionally. Been pushing all these behind me as hard as I could, so that I could keep on moving. But then, I think this is the break-out of everything. This small tiny adversity just exploded everything that I’ve been holding up. I broke into small pieces – so small that trying to put things back together is almost impossible.

Nevertheless, being a humble God’s creation, what choice do I have but to try & put things back no matter how impossible it can be. It might take years to do it but eventually it’ll be done for good, hopefully. Anyway, its hope that keeps life moving. Miseries have no other medicine but hope. Without hope we have nothing !


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