23 July 2009

Me & My Temper

Why is it so hard for me to control my temper at times? How can I avoid from being so jumpy? Instead of calming myself down I would just blew out without mercy. Blurted out all hose harsh words nobody can stand, only to make me regret thereafter.

Why cant I be a lil bit rational sometimes ? Why cant I put my emotions way behind my thoughts? Why cant I just think at least for a second before I did something stupid or said something bad? If only I did all these I’m pretty much sure I wont be hurting the feelings of those good people around me.

Today, again (God knows how many times) I’ve lost control of my temper. And again, I reacted foolishly – storming out my anger unnecessarily, when what happened is actually the same mistake I did before – only that I didn’t realize it until I’m in the other’s party’s shoe.

Well, like what Yasmin told me – what goes around would definitely comes around. I guess it’s payback time – karma is hitting back on me now. One thing with me, I can be very sarcastic when my tentacles are being touched. If words could kill, mine would be the deadliest weapon ever ! I’m neither proud nor pleased with this coz in the end; I’m the one who’ll look silly & stupid……(sigh).

From today onwards, I’ll do my utmost to control that temper of mine. Not to be jumpy unnecessarily, not to over-react over things and not to lost control of myself even when my tentacles are being touched! A person at my age should be full of wisdom rather than being childish. It’s good to put some senses to my thoughts before doing something foolish.

To all whom I’ve hurt their feelings before (Yasmin especially), I am begging your forgiveness from the bottom of my heart. I didn’t actually mean what I’ve said – it’s just that emotions have take control over my senses. Again, I am really, really sorry…….


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